I Want to be a....

I know I have been neglecting you all for weeks, and I know you are just salivating to know what I've been up to. (please see a medical professional if a little drool just seeped out-and a psychiatrist) To be honest I've been a little down lately. I've been a little sick, and struggling to make it through the day at the office. The daily grind is getting a little old and I've been doing some thinking. Perhaps a change of scenery is in order. (oddly enough Beat It by Michael Jackson just started playing on the computer) So while watching a little cable earlier I came across a show on the History Channel called Ax Men. Sounds cool right? I started watching these guys pull timbers out of the woods using a chopper. Within 5 minutes one broke loose from about 200 feet up and sent Mr. Logger high tailing it away from the scene, leaving the camera guy 20 yards behind. So guess what I want my next job to be? You're wrong. Now crab fishing in Alaska I'll do, but screw logging. If I fall out of the boat I can at least swim for it for a few minutes. If I get hit by a falling 2 ton log I'll just be fertilizer.

I think I need one of those jobs where you work for 2 weeks and then come home for 2 weeks. Like a roughneck on an oil rig or something. Just the thing for a college grad (sort of).

Other ideas I am entertaining-

• Professional Chef on some rich person's yacht (or a guest)
  
• Ice Cream Flavor Creator
  
• Brew Master
  
• NFL analyst
• Mystery Movie Watcher
• Casino host
• Protege to Hugh Hefner
• CIA operative
• Thoroughbred trainer
• Dolphin Jockey
• Chocolatier
• Somebody that gives money away for rich people to folks on the street

I'll do the last one for free.

So, do you know a guy that knows a guy? I need his number. Fast.